Ahhh flipping through the channels,
tired of my life. Its too weird to be here...
I've become bland, grey.... wait even grey has a personality... more than mine... i want to pain the world many colors so i can finally see.. and stop crying because i cry more than usual now a days... and have no clue as to why!!!!
IM SO WEAK!
I have a GREAT boyfriend.... i don't deserve him.
i have a comfortable life for now.. but still their are those pills i take to change my feelings. make them seem what they are not; so i can fit into this mold i have unhappily made for myself.
I don't want to be wild... and i am human, i do get tired.. i like to be myself... i wish i could just flow like the art i paint... or the occasional words i spill on pages.
sometimes i wish i knew who i was... i don't care what anyone thinks about it but-- man, when you have a shit day and someone calls you a "...ugly and stinky ass bitch..." they don't help you out much.. they probably could be the reason that you drag the metal across the skin and then laugh in ecstasy as the world becomes yours